You’ll remember I previously wrote about the Sucker Punch feeling, when I’m happily going on with normal life without a thought of the operation to come and something will happen to suddenly snap me back to reality, like a sucker punch. Well the biggest one I’ve had so far has happened and it wasn’t anything to do with the hospital, it was leaving work.
Work has been, by far, the best distraction from waiting for the hospital to call and the surgery to come round. It’s especially been distracting because of a major project I’ve been involved with starting, something I’m not going to get the chance to see through. So the last day certainly came with a bang.
It was a strange day from the very beginning. It started with a trip to the hospital for swab updates – because of the cold I’d had my previous results were out of date – and then a stop off for cakes for the team, and myself.
Little did I know that the team had also bought me cakes, and eating four of them for lunch wasn’t going to be the sweetest moment.
A specially made card was produced later in the afternoon, a picture of Cate Blanchett on the front – apart from being a fabulous actress she has that classic Hollywood beauty that is truly captivating on screen – and everyone crowded round my desk. That was the first punch for me. A realisation that this was the last day, and this was the start of the goodbyes and good lucks.
Those started to hit me when my colleague, let’s call her A., told me she was going to give me a hug as she left and it looked like there was a little tear in her eye. Boom. Another punch. I knew that a hug would just set me off, and even the small one she gave me was enough to get a lip wobble.
That was then compounded when another colleague, let’s call her D., called me and said she couldn’t be in today for fear of her bursting out bubbling too. Boom. I was away and couldn’t even talk on the phone. The reality was piling on.
It was a bit easier being in the pub afterwards, everyone buying me drinks, some great laughs and any thought of me being a manager and behaving myself left at the door.
The punches came lighter from then on, not sure if they were helped by the beer, but they weren’t helped by the continual cuddles from people leaving. Still, I kept it dry right till I got home. That was when another big hit came.
Returning home my wife knew exactly what it would have been like and what I would be feeling saying the goodbyes, and it wasn’t long before the emotion was pouring out as we both acknowledged the importance of the day.
The countdown has begun in earnest, but the next big punch won’t come until Monday, admission day. Although to be fair, today isn’t turning out to be that easy.