Finding Something I Thought I’d Lost

I’ve been finding that something has returned to me that I haven’t had for some time. There’s a combination of things that have sparked it off – playing around with mobile photography; getting the SLR out for night sky photography; picking up the guitar after a while away from it; reading a book that captured my imagination after so many have fallen short; playing some story rich and creative video games (yes, there are many); listening to my music collection instead of the regular radio stations, and just generally being inspired by things around me.

I’ve rediscovered something that I thought was lost, and it’s a wonderful feeling to have back.

Strange, I don’t know where it went to. Perhaps I just put it down for a few moments and I gently trundled off. It’s like I’d put down a suitcase while on a travellator but I’d missed the belt and it landed on the floor. As I was slowly pulled forward it disappeared off behind me.

It’s back with me though. It’s like a thought scratching at the back of my mind, and when there’s nothing else going on you hear it or feel it, that creative hum. That’s why I’m writing this today.

After so many years of Filmstalker my passion for writing and for watching films was killed. Loads of people were doing it for financial reasons and it became too much like work and not enough about what I loved doing. Watching films and reading scripts all the time has made me too analytical. No longer could I just watch a story unfold, experience and just enjoy the play. It was like watching a magician from behind the scenes or seeing all the cogs of an intricate clock instead of marvelling at the graceful movement of the hands.

Now though, I feel like writing. I want to pick up the guitar and play it. Something has come alive again.

Like so much of what I’ve written over the years, the plan for this one has gone out the window. This was just to write a short introduction, so I could explain why I’ve been reminded of Pablo Neruda’s poetry and post something about it. However, my thoughts and words have pulled me in a totally different direction.

I’m glad I’m here though. Glad I’ve found what I left behind in the slow rush forward.

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